My Bottom 10 Movies Of 2015 So Far

 MY BOTTOM 10 MOVIES OF 2015 SO FAR

In my previous post, I listed the best movies that the first half of 2015 had to offer. Now, I have the chance to name and shame the films that made going to the cinemas over the past 6 months utter torture. Yes, it's time to count down the 10 worst films of 2015 so far. 

As I mentioned in my ten best list, the year has proved to be, so far, rather middling. Of course, there have been the 'Whiplash's and 'Big Hero 6's to get me through the days but for every good film, 3 bad ones would take it's place. In fact, I'd say that this would be the first time since I started writing reviews back in 2012 that the bad pictures have outnumbered the good. To show just how bad some of these motion pictures have been, take a look at the films which didn't even make it into in the bottom 10 :

'Paul Blart Mall Cop 2' - A desperately unfunny sequel to a desperately unfunny original

'The Boy Next Door' - It may be hilarious but it's still terrible

'Monsters : Dark Continent' - A completely unneccesary follow up to one of the most original science fiction movies of the past decade

'Into The Woods' - Even the great Meryl Streep can't save this hideously grotty adaptation of the smash hit Sondheim musical of the same name

'Chappie' - Director Neill Blomkamp proves that he is nothing but a one trick pony with this generic and badly acted dystopian drama

'The Wedding Ringer' - It may be bad but, unbelievably, this isn't the worst Kevin Hart movie of 2015!

'Lost River' - Ryan Goslings directorial debut tries incredibly hard to be a David Lynch movie but fails in both character and plot development

Every single one of these drecks deserves a spot on any worst of 2015 list but unfortunately for me, I had to endure 10 'films' that were even more repugnant. Hold onto your butts....

10) 'HOT TUB TIME MACHINE 2'  

A completely unwanted sequel to what was, at best, a so-so comedy, 'Hot Tub Time Machine 2' takes the basic premise of 'The Terminator' and inserts unbelievably inappropriate peadophile and childish penis gags for a bunch of zero laughs. John Cusack refused to be in this horsecrap and it is very clear why!

9) 'TAK3N'  

Liam Neeson looks completely bored in this half-baked follow up to the already dreadful sequel to the brilliant 2007 action epic 'Taken'. There is flogging a dead horse and then there's picking the last decaying morsels of flesh off the mangled skeleton of a franchise that should have died years ago.

8)  'THE INTERVIEW'

Is this really the film that almost caused a global war? Seth Rogen and James Francos utterly uninspired satire about North Korea and an assassination attempt on Kim Jong Un could have been something volcanic and biting. Instead, it's the same tired stoner shtick and vulgar set pieces we have seen in any number of Rogen productions.

7) 'GET HARD'

Will Ferrell cements his place as the most annoying comedian working in cinema today with his performance as a wealthy businessman who is wrongly sentenced to a term in a notorious prison. Kevin Hart tries to save face but Ferrell unmistakable blend of shouting and acting like an overgrown toddler quickly drags 'Get Hard' to a frustrating and often offensive endurance test.

6) 'KNOCK KNOCK'

After his terrific performance in the blistering 'John Wick', I was extremely excited to see what Keanu Reeves would do next. Sadly, it had to be 'Knock Knock', an unforgivable horror farce from the once talented Eli Roth. Telling the story of a loyal family man who is tortured by two young girls after a threesome, 'Knock Knock' tries to be the next 'Basic Instinct' or 'Hard Candy' but lacks the talent in front of or behind the camera to be anything more than a pathetically inadequate and sometimes repugnant cinematic experience.

5) 'POLTERGEIST'

Not since Samuel Bayers 2010 'A Nightmare On Elm Street' has a horror remake been so utterly redundant. This 're-imagining' of Tobe Hoopers and Stevens Spielbergs 1982 shocker dispenses with any of the domestic horror that made it's original so popular and instead resorts to the same jump scare tactics that have infested the genre for the past decade or so. Not even the great Sam Rockwell can save this one.

4) 'HOME'

If 'Big Hero 6' showed us anything, it is that childrens entertainment doesn't need to pander to the lowest common denominator conventions and bottom of the barrel cliches to be popular. Well, if the box office figures for 'Home' are anything to go by, then sadly, you do. Boring, predictable and lacking an ounce of charm, 'Home' is the laziest form of animation. Zero story, annoying characters and filled to the brim with tuneless songs and pointless pop culture references.

3) 'INHERENT VICE'

In a recent top 10 list, I named Paul Thomas Anderson as my favourite modern film maker. That was before I saw the pretentious mess that is 'Inherent Vice'. Based on the cult psychedelic novel by Thomas Pynchon, Anderson envelopes the film in a suffocating air of hallucinogenic and quite incomprehensible haze and while the performances from it's cast are solid, the movie itself is a complete shambles from beginning to end. It's bad when a terrible director makes a terrible film. It's even worse when a truly great director makes a truly terrible film.

3) 'FIFTY SHADES OF GREY'

I don't care how many millions of dollars it made at the box office, I hated every single thing about this vile adaptation of E.L James' hideous popular novel. EVERY. SINGLE. THING. It's characters are horrible, it's story is puerile and the script is beyond painful. Although what do you expect from 'Twilight' fan-fiction? I dread it's forthcoming sequels like a condemned man dreads his execution....

1) 'MORTDECAI'

Johnny Depp used to be one of Hollywoods most popular and, more importantly, most profitable actors. However a string of box office bombs including 'Transcendence' and 'The Lone Ranger' has somewhat lost him his credibility. But whatever shred of credibility he did have left is now dead and buried thanks to his simply awful performance in 'Mortdecai', a dreadfully unfunny comedy caper that takes the worst performances of Depps career and blends them together in a horrible, teeth-gratingly annoying sludge. From it's opening seconds, I knew that I would hate 'Mortdecai' and my hatred only grew and as the movie continued. It was the first movie I saw in 2015 and it certainly set the tone for a tidal of wave of bad movies to come my way. But sadly, 'Mortdecai' would be and is, for now, the crowning achievement of terribleness this year. Is there any possible chance that a movie could come along as bad as this monstrosity in the final half of 2015? Only time will tell.....